I keep putting off writing this post. At first I thought it was regular-grade procrastination, but now I realize it’s because I’m tired of being angry.
But also, I realize, if I don’t write this post, then I can’t talk about any of the other things I want to talk about. So, the anger is a distraction.
Here’s the thing: I’m used to being angry. As I’ve said before–more than once–I’m like the Incredible Hulk: I’m always angry.
But, whew boy, this pandemic has made my anger levels rise and rise and rise until I’m just standing on the precipice of absolute rage.
I mean, we’re talking Joe Clark Rockefeller of outrage levels here.
Most of my anger (and rage) comes from the inept leadership this country faces, but it’s not only that. It’s the lack of compassion, it’s the lack of consideration, and it’s the lack of care. I can have empathy for people who are tired of socially distancing and who want to get back to what life is like before. But I just cannot stand the absolute and total disregard for human life that people have and more than that, the fact that leadership ON ALL LEVELS is being driven–not by compassion and not by concern for people’s health, but by money.
Whether schools should have face-to-face instruction isn’t about whether or not students or faculty can do so safely but about funding.
Whether restaurants should offer sit down service isn’t about safety but about money.
And on and on it goes.
Do not even get me started on the protestors.
Or the racism. Or the police brutality. Or the murder of black people at the hands of white people who think we should not occupy any kind of space. You would think that even during a life-altering global pandemic, we could get even one iota of relief from these things, but no.
So not only do I get to be angry in a general sort of way but I get to also continue to experience daily minority rage. I mean, my god.
So, yes, I’m angry. I am always angry. But now I’m angry and have to deal with a global pandemic and the attendant rage that is causing on top of it.