I have gotten a couple of text messages from friends–white friends–asking me how I’m doing or how I’m holding up, and the answer is the same for all.
I’m angry and I’m weary. I’m angry and I’m weary and I’m tired of talking about being angry and weary. If you want to know the depths of my anger and weariness, I’ve found that the following three Instagram posts pretty well encapsulate where I am. The first one is a short video (three minutes) and a transcription has been helpfully provided here. The other two speak for themselves.
View this post on Instagram
Sending power and rest vibes to those on the frontlines. If I could send pillows and blankets and erect a rest tent at every protest in the nation, I would. Resist. Please donate to the bail funds across the nation. #napministry #thenapministry #restasresistance #restisresistance #sleep #rest #spiritualcare #healing #naps #napping #soulcare #selfcare #chicago #atlanta #performanceart #naptime #community #archive #spiritualdirection #reparations #joy #socialjustice #racialjustice #justice #communitycare #womanism #restisreparations
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💛 Please allow Black voices to stand in this tiredness today. Do not come onto this thread if you are a white person and say "me too!" Your tiredness is not our tiredness – ancient and deep and connected to the Transatlantic Slave Trade. Go and post that you are tired of America on your page. Share that with your friend. Create a meme. Send it to your networks and family. Start a conversation with your community. #napministry #thenapministry #restasresistance #restisresistance #sleep #rest #spiritualcare #healing #naps #napping #soulcare #selfcare #chicago #atlanta #performanceart #naptime #community #archive #spiritualdirection #reparations #joy #socialjustice #racialjustice #justice #communitycare #womanism #restisreparations
Adding on this is that I have a young person here with me who is stressed and scared but also doesn’t have the depth of–I don’t even know the word–weariness? knowledge? experience? education? of how trying this country is on a day-to-day basis, though she is quickly learning. We are fairly privileged, especially in that we don’t live close to the chaos that’s touching most of Los Angeles County, and still she wants me to keep the blinds closed and the windows closed because “we don’t know who our neighbors are.”
So, yes. I’m weary. And I’m angry. And I’m tired of talking about it.
My rating: 1 of 5 stars
This book is so, so, so, so, SO, SO BORING. Nothing happens in the first one hundred (100! One hundred! O N E H U N D R E D!) pages.
Also, Lisbeth is the most interesting character in this book and instead of learning anything about her background, I get extensive biographies on *checks book* the Vagner family, most of whom are dead. DEAD! Just…why?
I am mad at myself. I should have stopped reading but I wanted to be a good book club citizen after abandoning the past two books.
PLUS ALSO, there are three graphic rape scenes back-to-back that literally made me sick to my stomach, and I still don’t know why they were there. To show me that Lisbeth is a badass? To show me that there are sexual predators out there? That some of those sexual predators are sadists? I could have gotten that same information without graphic rape details, thanks. (And I did later in the book and while those details were gruesome, there was no play by play of the rape, so I know the author could have done it.)
I guess this is a payoff book in that it gets super interesting in the last 20% of the book, but you know, then it goes back to being boring in the last 7% or so as well.
And I get that there was supposed to be intertwined corruption or whatever, but, seriously, how many plot threads did there honestly need to be here?
I liked Lisbeth (obviously), I liked Mikael, I liked Erika. The rest of the book I could quite honestly chuck in the bin. I skimmed most of it anyway because of all the details about things I didn’t care about that honestly didn’t even factor into solving the one, two, three with a possible four mysteries in the book.
Also, at some point, I realized I probably could have read three books in ALL THE TIME I spent avoiding reading and then forcing myself to read this.
I’m going to go scrub my brain with a middle grade book now.
1.5 stars, rounding down because I’m still mad I actually read the whole thing.